Mak

F*** Around with Me, & You're Going to End Up Feeling Lonely! I know you probably don’t understand how I was once interested in you to no longer wanting you around, and the answer is simple! I got bored, and the feelings that you thought I was showing weren’t real. I was just mirroring you so I could feel something that made it easier to be with you and not have you see me as someone who was cold-hearted and uncaring! I know it’s fucked up to do such a thing, but it’s how I am with everyone I come in contact with, so I don’t end up getting hurt in the process when the time comes to moving on!  You probably saw me picture perfect, but deep down, that’s not me, nor will it ever be! The only thing picture perfect about me is the photos I take! So I apologize in advance if my charm and characteristics threw you off! It was never my intention to have you get close enough to where you started thinking about me! I was simply just testing the waters out and seeing if the dating scene w...

Can We Go Back to Being Friends? Not sure how I even got to this place, but here I am once again going through the motions and feelings just thinking about how you're doing and what you've been up to since we last talked and went our separate ways. Hopefully, everything for you has been going well and you've figured out what you've wanted to do with your life and met some of those goals you talked about reaching. I'm sorry for not reaching out or making my presence known to you. I just thought keeping my distance would make you forget about me, while I sat back and ended up wishing the best for you. I see you out and about every now and then, but I don't make it my business to approach you or say hi because I think the feelings would just come back to me, and I don't wanna feel those things knowing you don't feel the same way towards me. I know I tend to get caught up in my head and feelings to think clearly, and as much as I tell myself it no longer mat...

...And Suddenly You're Calling Up My Line?!? Please just ignore all the shit I'm bout to say, it has nothing to do with you or anyone around me. It's just for my own use, and I don't know how else to explain the shit I'm feeling without it being directed towards them that doesn't hurt them. It's kind of fucked up how your line has been disconnected, but then I see you posted up with your new man, thinking I'd feel some type of way, but instead I just said to myself it was about damn time and logged out the account. I didn't think anything about it or care to do anything else other than just sleep and go to work in the morning. I was actually proud and happy for you, but then you had the urge to somehow ruin all of that by reaching out, which, to my surprise, I could have sworn you had me blocked, so for you to randomly reach out after you posted that photo just gave me wtf vibes. Cause what do you mean you're apparently in a happy relationship, t...

Love Yourself, Not Me Not sure how I ended up here again when I thought I was done with all of this. But somehow the timeline brought me back to this, and now I can't seem to escape it, and no matter how much I try to ignore it and keep myself busy from the thought of it, I'm here typing away. I wish this shit were easy, but it never is. Maybe from my point of view it is, but those watching it's more like a maze trying to figure me out and my doings, and I wish it wasn't. I wish things could be easy, but they never are, and as much as I try to break it down to make it easier to process, I end up feeling like the bad guy all over again. So I let it fall and be for what it is and start all over. I keep wanting to escape the cycle of back and forth, but that's all I'm ever good at, it seems. I know I can only hope that you could see where I'm coming from, but that would take a miracle from the looks of it. I kept self-sabotaging and isolating myself thinking it...

Hope I'm Not Asking for Too Much Sorry for not keeping this site updated or posting on any platform to make it seem like I'm fine. However, I've decided to stop lying about how I'm feeling, so I just decided to fade into the background until I felt better about myself and my actions. I kept busy with the street photography and my job, but overall, I've been feeling more lost than ever. I don't know if it's because of the whole moving situation that I'm trying to figure out, or if it's the fact that I'm close to 30 and still feel so behind in life, even though I'm financially fine and doing well for myself for the most part. But for some reason, I have days where I feel like the things I'm doing don't really matter, and I should just stop and end it all as it is and go live a life in another realm where it's better for my soul and mind. I've cut ties and lost contact with almost everyone I've ever talked to because if somet...