Blog Post 540

I'm Good On My Own!

Yeah, I don't really have any second thoughts about the move or the things I left behind. If anything, I feel better off knowing I'm no longer associated with those things from my past. It's all good and fine now that I'm completely out of the way with all of the things from my second hometown. I don't really think too much of it or care to reach out to anyone. I'm too content with making my home here in Florida and starting a new life here. I'm good with the thought of everyone I left and made amends to, but overall it's really no longer any of my business. They can still reach out to me about what's going on, but I'm not trying to catch up or keep tabs on anyone from N.C.

I feel like that part of me is dead and gone, and it's for a good reason. I was never fully capable of being myself, and now that I'm finally out, I can finally breathe for once. I know eventually the past will come back to throw me in a loop, but for now I'm good with what I have, and knowing I got out is good enough for me. I know me leaving behind all the close people I once had a connection with was kind of sudden, but honestly, I was never really a friend of theirs, and as much as I try to tell myself I was, I would just be lying to myself and to them, and I'm tired of lying to people. I'm in my carefree, not gonna sugarcoat shit with others, and just live my life era. I'm tired of the back-and-forth shit, so just do what you need to while I do me. 

I'm not gonna be bothered by the shit that goes down in my hometown behind my back. Fuck it! I know what I did was best for me, and now y'all just need to do what's best for you. I'm tired of being the planner for everyone when I just wanted to focus on my own doings, and now that I've accomplished my doings, I hope you do the same for yourself. I'm sorry for never opening up to anyone or telling anyone about my moves ahead of time, but in all honesty, I wasn't trying to have other people telling me what I could and couldn't do with my life. Shit like that always pissed me off. I'm glad I made the decision to move and free myself from such a boring and draining environment. I hope I never have to go back to that place or see those people ever again. If anything, I'll go up to New York, skipping past North Carolina and all the hate that it brings. I don't mean to bash the state I grew up in, but if I'm being honest, that state didn't really suit me or my needs.