Blog Post 535

N.C to FL

I can't believe it's finally happening!!! I'm so excited for this new chapter in my life of getting out of this small town I'm currently in and going somewhere where I feel like I belong! I know I've been going back and forth on where to move and when to do it, but I think it's finally time to stop thinking and take some action. So I called my mother one day and said, " Hey, I wanna leave North Carolina and she said okay where would you like to move to and I said I was thinking Florida, and she said, " Okay, " and now I'm ending my lease, selling all of my stuff, and packing away what little left I have to bring with me. I know this move is going to be good for my mental health since I'll be with my dog and mom, but overall, just the atmosphere of nobody knowing me and I can just create a name for myself elsewhere with no drama and make new friends, which will involve me getting out of my comfort zone.

But I think it'll be all worth it. I'll finally be able to relax without feeling like all eyes are on me, since nobody knows me. Who knows, I might just use my other accounts and forget about the whole "MXKSVT" brand and just go back to being just a face you don't know a name to. I've been thinking about switching numbers as the first thing I do when I get down there and just starting fresh. I have no need for people from N.C trying to contact me or wonder about me since I never had any good experiences with the people down here to begin with. So who knows if I'll change my number or not, but it's like top 3 on my list. I know I'm probably overthinking all of it, but at the same time I don't want people from my past reaching out to me because I'm pretty sure I just wanna forget all about the things that happened to me in North Carolina and just exist for me and only me while I'm starting this new chapter in Florida. 

I've gone through my contact list and deleted all the coworkers I never talked to and simply just removed anyone I wasn't close to off my socials. Because I feel like there's no need for you to keep up with my doings when I'm no longer in your city. It's giving stalker vibes; at least that's how I see it. I know my presence will be talked about and questioned, but honestly it's okay with me because I never talked to anyone anyway. After all, I know my presence here won't last long after I move. So hopefully this move will reconnect my relationship with my mother again, and my dog remembers who I am again, lol!! I just wish I didn't wait this long trying to figure out where I wanted to be and what I wanted to do with my life, and I have made plans to go get a degree in some sort of coding/website design class and just see what happens after that. 

I know it's going to take a while, but with the amount of knowledge I've gained from doing it on my own and learning ways to "hack" and "edit" things, I think I'll do just fine! So there's no worry in that department. I'm just trying to branch out to better reasources so I have a better understanding of what all I'm capable of doing and have to do to better myself in the things I'm good at and passionate about if that makes sense because I just know ther's nothing for me in North Carolina and as much as I tried to look for things that would satisfy my needs and keep me busy I never really got across to finding it. So my time just felt it was being wasted. So hopefully when I'm in Florida, that will all change and I can be a busybody to where the only thing I know is work and sleep!!

I feel like since I don't have any attachment issues or care about people enough to miss them, that this move will honestly be a piece of cake for me. I haven't really reached out or talked to anyone about the exact date I'm moving. All of done is post some stories that I'm finally moving, and that's it, because the exact date is still in the air depending on whether I can fit all my shit in the two cars or not. Other than that, it will definitely be within a 30-day time frame from now. So yeah, I'm ready to get the hell out of the 252 and move into an area I have zero information on!! I love exploring new places and finding places I can call my chill spot and just hanging out doing what I do best, which is either photography or deep in thought in my notes app, drawing out ideas for a new blog post to publish. But I know when I move down there, my blog post content will definitely have a shift in tone or simply just dry up because I won't be focused on publishing. 

I have a feeling I might end up making another journalism site where it's just a day-to-day life or a week-to-week life updates on what's been going on while I'm living in Florida, but that's just an idea and not something I'm willing to start as I move down there. It's just in the air floating around. So it may or may not happen, so don't hold me to it!! I might still publish; I might not! I will say my Instagram might go back to being active and the archive site might see some love again, but nothing is for certain right now. I'm still trying to plan out the drive for me to get down there. I don't know if I should just do it all in one day or if I'm gonna have to split it in two. That's always a hard decision for me because of my A.D.H.D!!! Once I set my mind to doing something, I just go for it. Just like the other night when my mom gave me the go-ahead and I told her, " Bet, " and almost started packing my car that night up and almost drove to Florida in the morning!! I'm so impulsive at times when it comes to moving/traveling!! Like, just let me get to where I'm headed without the backa nd forth thoughts. As long as the G.P.S is on and the music is good, I'm chilling!!!