Blog Post 533
Can't Feel a Damn Thing!
Yeah, I’m so zoned out of all the feelings I tried so hard to keep around that are dead and gone! There’s nothing left of me for you to gain or manipulate out of me! I’m so done with it all that everything feels like a joke to me, so now all I do is laugh and carry on! I no longer care to ask follow-up questions or wonder why shit happened the way it did! Ended up letting go way too much way too quickly, and honestly I don’t mind it! Found out what people were really wanting from me, and I didn’t find it worth my time, so I cut them all out and ghosted my entire bloodline! I no longer have it in me to make or find the time for others in my life! Fuck you and everyone that knows me / of me! I don’t care for this life enough to sit around and fake shit with people!
If you got me feeling some type of way, you’re done, and you won’t hear from me ever again! Stop thinking shit so personal! I’ve always been like this! Not sure why it’s such a shocker when it happens to people, especially when I barely even talked to them for a day / a week at most! People be so temporary I don’t even bother making myself known or giving out the real information on myself! I love lying to newcomers because why the fuck are you trying to get to know me?! Who sent you? I swear people think it’s a game and I’m just here to let you have your ways, but in all honesty I’m just sitting back observing all the shit you do and taking a mental note of it, and once you slip up it’s a wrap! Ain’t no second chances! You should’ve known not to do that fake shit around me! Now you’re blowing up my line, acting as if I did you wrong?! Hoe, are you cool?! You knew what I was about and you still chose to fuck it up lol! Over there thinking I ever gave a fuck about you or the shit you did for me! Wow, you bought some food for me?! My own neighbor does the same shit for me; you ain’t special! The fuck?! God, y'all are so clueless as to what I really need and want! And it shows!
All I ever need and want is to be left alone, and you couldn’t even let me have my alone time without thinking some weird shit! Like bro, you were draining the life out of me when you would come over! I hate having people over, and you kept asking when can you come see me, and every time I’d say I don’t know, I’m busy, you acted as if I was lying! Like, no bitch I have other shit to attend to besides other people who are just a stick in the mud having ass! It’s really nothing against you, but you really had me fucked up, to where ghosting you felt like the safest option! I didn’t think anything g of it because I think of you in any way other than someone who would just come over with food! I really didn’t care to get to know you or anything in that sense because I already know what I want and need in my life, and it wasn’t you, let alone anyone that’s in this town, as a matter of fact! That’s why I’m always in and out of the city limits because they live elsewhere! Stop thinking you know my whole life when you barely scratched the surface! Shit is weird as fuck making you look like a damn stalker! Like damn! I know you can Google me and whatnot, but you thinking you know my entire bloodline is beyond me! Yeah, I can see why my friends told me to drop your weird ass! Like ugh! So pathetic!
I hate when people think they got me figured out after a week or so of hanging out! Like no sweetheart, I only play the part, and once my time is done it’s a wrap for you, and you gotta go! I ain’t trying to have you or anyone in my business! Especially when it’s late at night, and my phone goes dark! Like why does that even bother you?! It’s been like that for years now, and all of a sudden you got a problem with it out of everyone who knows me?! Yo got me fucked up! I’m not changing my routine/life for a temporary ass person who already showed me their true self! Like you couldn’t even pass my disappearing and dissociation phase, so why the fuck would I bother having you in my life for?! Like I’m sorry, but I’m not about to explain my life to nobody, especially when it comes to my feelings! Because it’s not your business!! So thanks for letting me see what you’re like when someone ghost / disappeared on your goofy ass!! I swear people wanna be so invested in someone's life and not know a damn thing what their life is really like! Like what the fuck are you weirdos on?! Just let people be and let them live the life they’re comfortable with! The fuck you gotta go in and start charging shit around?! Like bitch nobody even knows you or gives a fuck about you! So why did it bother you so much on what I was doing?! Like what the fuck?! Ugh, this is why I hate being around people!