Blog Post 306
Should've Never Said Hello Again
I wish I knew where to begin with this but it’s all just coming out of me like a flow of tears and I can’t stop thinking bout how things could have been differently if we had just met a year or two sooner when we had all the time in the world to be our selves and laugh as if we had all the time in the world!
I wish there was another way to talk to you but knowing how things ended between us two it’s clear to me that things will never be the same and that's okay because honestly we’re good on our own doings and I’m no longer concerned on the shit we do and don’t do anymore!
It was just a moment I got caught up in thinking things could work out between us two but it’s clear things will never be how we actually wanted them to be and I just gotta accept it for what it is and I’m well aware of what you’re doing and who you’re after and I wish I could’ve put the pieces together but I was so in love with you that nothing else even mattered and it’s my fault! I should’ve taken per cautionary when it came to you and your doings! But I wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt that we could make things work but you just proved me otherwise!
It just sucks I had to hide my true feelings for you when you couldn’t take the time to get to know the real me even though I gave it my all at the time to give you everything you asked for. But I guess it was too soon and it was over before I even got a chance to start something real with you! I guess the timing was just off and it was my fault for thinking things could work between us two even though you’re the one who thought it would be a good idea to have me come and see you on my days off but I guess you were too busy looking at your other options that you forgot what I was willing to do for you whenever you needed!
But like I said it’s all good! I’m not feeling you anymore and I don’t have anything to say about you let alone to you other than just wishing you’re okay and safe! Because that was always my number one rule when it came to you! It wasn’t about this and the third it was only in my best interest to ensure you were safe!
I’m sorry I made it seem like I was too much to handle when honestly I was just doing my best to keep you company and watch out for your well-being but I guess I overstepped somewhere / somehow! So I’ll go ahead and apologize to you when we cross paths but for now, I just need time to be on my own again and figure out how me caring for someone like you would have you want to go out of your way and make me seem like the bad guy when all I had was love for you!