Blog Post 125

I Fucked Up

I'll never be able to live this down or forget about everything that I did to you. I'm just actually glad I gave/leaked my number to the public/online world. I'm starting to understand the shit I did was never to be even thought of doing or to actually be done to someone I cared about. I had so many texts coming in my phone basically crashed and I'm like oh shit and finally got my phone to work again after 15 minutes of it being off. So I went and read about like 30 people's text saying how they felt about the situation. Some agreed to an extent but majority of them just said it was really fucked up what I did to you and I just replied with I agree. Some even asked the same question as you "Why do this to someone you care about?" and I just didn't respond because I felt like none of my answers would've justified the question and if I would've responded it would have just turned out to be even worse. So I just didn't even respond/didn't know how to respond to it.

Had someone say they were going to find me and I'm like okay and then they started asking for all my info so I gave it to them. So if they show up they show up if not then they can just leak all the info I gave them. I'm really not in any position to argue or fight with people knowing what I did to you. So like whatever people are leaking/saying about me I honestly don't even have the time to bother with it or even care about it considering I deserve everything that's happening to me right now. I'm not really scared about my life being fucked up considering I fucked my life up the moment I posted the shit I posted onto social media. So it's been taking its toll on me. I'm just now experiencing the after-effects it seems like. I knew I'd have to face it sooner or later and I chose now because I'm tired of not being able to take any responsibility for this when that's all I want to do. It might not the right way but at least I'm doing it.

I just want to learn from this and know never to do this shit to anyone else that comes into my life. I need to be more open with them and tell them how I feel about certain jokes/games that they might play and just let them know I don't play that. I wish I had the chance to do that with you but I wasn't even in the right state of mind so it's way past that with you and I just wish I found another way to go about things instead of going straight to social media and exposing you/leaking private info about you. But don't worry I'm about to expose myself even more and leak my nudes so I know what it's like. I'm not saying that to be funny or act like I'm joking about it. I'm seriously going to find a way to put all my info on the web for anyone to find/lookup. If that means I have to use this platform or I just go ahead and create a pornhub account to do it then by all means, I'll do. Like I'm not any position to act like a bitch. I did you so wrong and now I have to take in the karma and accept everything that's happening to me.